What is the Breast Feeding Club?
It's a place for anyone interested in breast feeding (for
it's genuine purpose - anybody not here for genuine reasons will be dealt
with accordingly). We have 2 main purposes -
1 - to provide a support, companionship, friendship and information to our
members and
2 - to strive to get breast feeding made the norm, publicly acceptable and
well supported.
We will achieve through use of both our site pages and forums. We will support and publicise any relevant campaigns and run our own. We will point people in the right direction of the help they need and campaign for better help and support for those who can't get it.
We are not about berating formula feeders. We are about making sure that those who breast feed have the support they need to make a success of it readily available, that mums are fully prepared before they even start, that more feels feel empowered to make the choice to breastfeed despite opposition, and that once they have they get nothing but correct advise. Far too many mums are left believing they really could not breastfeed when they could have done - if only they had the right support in place. This is what must stop!
This quote from one of our members pretty closely sums up what the breast feeding club is all about.
"it may be fact that these mums could have physically breast fed but that's irrelevant when it's just presented as a simple statement of such with absolutely no back up or explanation. And even if it was given with all the explanation it still isn't a fact that needs sharing unless it is appropriate to do so - which would only be if somebody had actually asked for reasons why bf is better than ff for instance, not if they ask which formula is better! Regardless of whether breast is better than formula or not the question was which formula is better. It is like somebody asking which artificial sweetener is better because they are diabetic and then being told to use sugar because sugar is better than any chemical sweeteners - it may well be, nobody would deny that, but if you can't eat sugar you can't - full stop and no amount of telling people how terrible artificial sweeteners are is going to change that fact.
t's hard and I admit to sitting on the fence most of the time as i just don't want to get involved. I do see where those who have very strong opinions are coming from and where they get their opinions from, however i do not agree with the way they deliver their message at all. Part of the problem i believe is that many of them are frustrated by the number of mums who have not succeeded to breastfeed for whatever reason and are convinced they were physically unable to but who given the right support could have done. Whether those mums could have done or not is actually irrelevant though - the support was not there, they didn't get the help they needed to succeed so to all intents and purposes they are 100% correct in believing there is no way on earth they could have breast fed and all resulting feelings of failure/guilt/etc that come along with that.
There is no point in going on about the good of breast feeding or the bad
of formula to mums who have been in that situation. nothing will change the
past, nothing can negate their experiences and feelings and to keep telling
them they could have done 'if they'd tried' is only going to make things worse
for them. they did try! I have sat with mums who were trying but the only
support they had was me and I couldn't be there enough to help them get through
it even if I knew they could do it - therefore they could not! Full stop end
of conversation! It was impossible for these women to breastfeed no matter
how much they wanted to because they needed something else that was not available
to them in order for them to make it work.
So please you ladies who are so pro-breastfeedng (I am too, I just understand
that it isn't always as easy as it could be or even should be) remember that
there's no point going on to mums who couldn't do it before and direct your
energies towards getting the system changed so that those who do need it in
future get the support and information they need! So that women are actually
given all the info they need before the event (you only have to read the bf
forums anywhere to realise that few mums are truly prepared for the realities
of breastfeeding because nobody has ever really told them anything - and many
breast feeding guides are rather wishy-washy and vague), so that breastfeeding
is seen as acceptable and the norm etc (because in some places it isn't),
that the health professionals supposedly there to support mums are fully trained
and conversant in all matters of feeding (again, just look at the forums anywhere
and you see how many mums are given duff information by so called professionals!),
that support starts coming from with the system automatically and not via
volunteers and voluntary groups as most of it does now which the mums themselves
have to go and seek out at a time when they don't know their arse from their
elbow! Then you'll see a change in the bf/ff rates and a lot more happy breastfeeders
and a lot less 'feel like a failure' mums, and surely that achieves what it
is that you believe should happen? There is no point upsetting the mums for
whom it is past history - does not help anyone."
FAQ
Why do you have adverts on the site?
Unfortunately sites cost money to run and the breastfeeding club is run by volunteers who pay for it out of their own pockets. The adverts do not provide a direct income (we can't 'sell' advertising space like traditional print media does) however should any of our site users actually follow any of the links and buy products from the advertisers we will get paid a small amount (very small!). We don't want to have to charge for membership of the site, it is important to us that use of the club remains free to all so we do have to make some efforts to try to recoup some of the expenses.
We do try to keep the adverts relevant to the site (baby, mum and breastfeeding topics) and for the spot adverts use companies we ourselves know as well as trying to keep the adverts as unobtrusive, yet still noticeable, as possible.
Do I have to be breastfeeding to be a member?
No, anyone with an interest in the subject, or able to help others with an interest, is more than welcome to join and participate in the breastfeeding club.
Why do you suggest contacting another organisation such as the NCT. LLL or ABM so often?
Because these organisations can provide you with hands on, practical help and advice, can come out to your homes, offer face to face support groups etc and offer phone lines for instant assistance if needed. These are not services the breastfeeding club can offer at present. Who knows for the future but for now these organisations can do it far better than the breastfeeding club so we'll refer on when we feel a member would benefit from their services.
Will I be berated if I choose, or have, to bottle feed at any point for any reason?
No, not at all. However, this is the breastfeeding club so that's what's it about. mix feeders, breast feeders who transferred to bottles, bottle feeders who are interested in trying breastfeeding, bottle feeders who tried to breastfeed but didn't succeed and want to try again - all are welcome. Just don't expect to find any discussion on the merits of making a choice to formula feed and never breastfeed to be well received :) although we all fully understand that for some mums there truly is no choice for medical reasons - even if those problems were surmountable but the support was not in place to get mum and baby past any problems. Part of the breastfeeding club's raison d'etre is to campaign to get the support services improved so mums don't fail for lack of support. Besides there are plenty of mums out there who bottle feed but who's babies have never tasted a drop of formula.
I'd like to write an article for the breastfeeding Club - how do I do this and how much do you pay?
You can just write one if you want and send it in - we'll use it if we like it. or you can email us with your idea and we'll let you know if we have anything similar planned already. Chances are if it's about breastfeeding and fits the tone of the site we'll like it. As for pay - we're sorry but we can't pay. As above the site is run by volunteers and has no budget (yet!) we do however promise that all contributors are fully credited and acknowledged and you are free to link to any articles we publish of yours as examples of your work.
Site design by Rosharn
All content © sjbarton unless otherwise indicated.